The 86th Academy Awards Recap

March 03, 2014
The teleprompter had one job to do. Ellen delivered pizzas to the audience. The internet blew up over Leo's loss to Matthew McConaughey. Surprisingly, the Academy Awards wasn't a major hot mess as it has been in recent years.

Red Carpet
Am I going to be the only one to admit that this was the most boring red carpet event ever? Not only did E! cut coverage off by an hour, but the "interviews" by Ryan Seacreast lacked severe interest in every person he was talking to.

Cate Blanchett's dress was pretty, and Lupita N'yongo had a spectacular collection of high fashion throughout the award show season...but really only Charlize Theron made gasp when I saw her. How are there not gifs of her arrival?

My favorite Red Carpet moment is from a premiere of Blue is the Warmest Color with Lea Seydoux. This isn't just a dress. This is an Audrey Hepburn movie. I kept waiting for a beautiful stunning moment like this to take place at the Oscars and it just didn't.

I felt E! treated Anne Hathaway's arrival very disgracefully - so much so I think I'm going to swear off watching their coverage from now on and just catch all the gifs online. Guiliana and her superficial criticizing clan sat around rating all of the stars' dresses after they arrived, and they treated Anne Hathaway like she had committed a horrible criminal offense for showing up and wasn't worth their time. Meanwhile Jennifer Lawrence went on later in the evening to shout at people as she made her way to the podium before presenting the Best Actor award and talking during Matthew McConaughey's acceptance speech - and somehow every still finds that disrespectful behavior sweet and endearing.

The Award Show
I thought honestly Ellen did a wonderful job. The show kicked off with an hilarious opening monologue and a fun performance of Happy by Pharrell Williams. She ackowledged people that were in attendance, but she made it apart of a joke - so it wasn't constantly "Meryl Streep is here" *twenty minutes of applause* "And, now I'm going to tell a joke". While the musical sequences seemed to get more flat and drab as the evening went forward, Ellen kept up with her usual amazingness. I really enjoyed the mix of montages they showed throughout the show and different introduction music of famous movie theme songs.

Ellen's impromptu spectacles is really what made the show more interesting. What could've been more amazing than her bringing in pizza to deliver to movie industry's iconic stars? For heaven's sake, Spacey and Pitt literally lept out of their seats to help feed their fellow starving artists.

Oh, she created the most retweeted photo of all time breaking the previous record of 500,000+ hitting 2,192,000 (the last time I checked). She broke the internet. The making of this photo should be a biopic.

The show had it's hiccups as usual. Of such many examples: 
  • The memoriam excluded several actors.
  • Whoopi introduced Pink to sing Over the Rainbow while Liza, Lorna and Joe only showed up to take a bow. For all the hype of the Wizard of Oz tribute, I thought it was going to be more grand in scale.
  • What was wrong with the teleprompter? Every single person was pronounced wrong, or it was moving to fast or too slow. It has one job to do for the actors who don't attend rehearsals - have the right name programmed to appear on screen.

At the after party Jane Fonda was rudely interviewed by another E! online journalist (go figure) and she reportedly said that she hated a lot of things that happened in the show but enjoyed Ellen's hosting job - I wondered what she was not too happy about it. If her and June Squibb could team up and report honest backstage and red carpet interviews, that would be amazing.

Thank You Tumblr

Sarcastic Spacey
How can such a respected actor be both so obviously appreciative of his work and shamlessly sarcastic? Every time Spacey showed up on screen whether it was to dole out money for the pizza delivery man, help Ellen pass out pizza, or was interviewed on the red carpet, it was had this amazing charisma to look like he simultaneously could care less about being there and also make you think that he couldn't want to be anywhere else in the world.

Go Get It, Gravity
Gravity won seven awards. Seven Awards. I figured it would snag some of the technical nods, but I did not think it would sweep almost every category it earned. And, to let me be frank: earned every nom it did. Having sat through all nine Best Picture nominees over two (separate) weekends it was hard to imagine which film that should take home all the gold. By the end of the screenings, Gravity easily had my vote. Unlike any other of the films, Alfonso Cuaron's motion picture is not just a movie - it's a cinematic experience. My hats off to 12 Years A Slave and Steve McQueen winning Best Picture. As repetitive as the evening became hearing Gravity called again and again, I was happy it was got all those awards!

Your Dreams Are Valid
The Best Supporting Actress category was certainly a nailbiter. Though I've criticized the legitimate scale of how the fandom world paves over other actresses to prop Jennifer Lawrence up on a pedestal, I was never rooting for her to lose. Honestly, I was rooting for June Squibb after finally seeing Nebraska or Lupita N'yongo - it's a shame however that Lupita's win has come at the cost of riotous hatred to JLaw. The beauty of her moment shall not be tarnished by such petty and superficial time-wasting debates. She gave one of the most wondrous speeches of the night.

All Right, All Right, All right

The most important moment of the evening was Matthew McConaughey becoming an Academy Award winner. He could've talked all night, he could've wined and dined us with his infinite stories about his past and wisdom. McConaughey is simply the man every guy should aspire to be: charismatic, faithful, hard working and passionate. Everyone uses "Crying" as a tag on tumblr and twitter, and whose to say the people who do so are or are not actually doing so. Being a fan of his for so long and loving The Dallas Buyers Club, I was overcome with fangirl emotion. If you were not moved by his speech, quite possibly one of the best in recent Oscar history, you are a robot.

And, this is hard for me to admit because my family knows that pretty much no one compares to my level of respect and admiration for Matthew than Leonardo DiCaprio. These two are my boys. Both men have had an amazing past few years in their careers, and no one should cap this loss for Leo as the end for him. As much as we want Leo to win, it's a fair reminder that he is not the poster boy for underrated actors who have gone unrecognized by a lack of a nominations: Cary Grant, Irene Dunne, Alfred Hitchcock - or wins such as Amy Adams - to name a few. She is one of the most reliable talented actresses earning five nominations in eight years without a single win - in the words of Shaun of the Dead, everybody just calm the *** down. And just keep living!

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